Tuesday, September 10, 2013

I Keep Hitting Repeat.

In our family, I am not the repeater. Even if I love a song, movie, food, etc. I'm pretty content to enjoy something once, maybe twice, and then I'm satisfied. Jake, however, will play songs over and over until I'm pretty sure I've gone insane. But he's perfectly happy to keep listening. Same with movies. I'm really hoping that I never have to see Paul Blart Mall Cop ever again...

Anyway, that's why this is so strange. I can't stop listening to this song.

This song is not new, and yet it touches me to the core every time I listen to it.

I feel like I am in a season where God is exposing a lot of my inner workings and struggles. I see things that need to change and I resist or I self-loathe or I mourn. I try to fix myself and fail. God is ever so gracious and tender with me but it leaves me feeling raw and, honestly, unlovable. I know I am loved, but I just can't imagine why. Do you ever feel like that?

But this song takes me full circle. I need God to show me all the unsurrendered and dark places in my heart. I have to trust that He is good enough and strong enough to bring me through deep transformation. I need Him to do that. I am too weak to do it on my own, but His spirit is strong and His love is great. And at the end of the day, He will not fail me. And He won't fail you either.

"Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Philippians 1:6

So if you need a faith refresher in the form of a song, go ahead and hit repeat a few times. I'm with you on this one.

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